August 5th, 1999
You ever find yourself in a situation you don't want to be in? Happens to the best of us. I don't mean the freak in Atlanta with the big ideas. That was of my own doing and I have to admit it makes a good report. The situation I'm talking about happened this week when I met the future life hippies.
Now that's not to say that all hippies are bad. I'm sure there was some really nice hippies in the 60's that bathed on schedule, ate cheeseburgers, and did all that.. I've never heard of hippies like that but I'm sure they exist.
No, the hippies I met with this week were your garden variety, bad clothes wearing, long hair growing, in touch with your inner child, hippies. They looked like they had come straight out of 1973. They're clothes were retro, they're house was retro, and the smell of incense was pungent in the air. I just wanted to grab 'em and shout. It's 1999, cut your hair, get a job, start a 401K.
But I didn't. I interviewed them, and petted their 18 cats and ate their organic pasta and heard all about their new future life progression science. See what I go through for you people?
Gives me the shakes just thinking about it. Think I'll go burn down a coupla acres of the rain forest and use some kittens for scientific research.
Derek "peace out" Barnes