November 10th, 2000
or how about..
Yo, yo, yo, and a bottle of rum...
You know it gets hard sometimes to keep thinking up original salutations everytime I write a new entry. I guess I could just say "hi" but that sounds kinda boring to me. Humm.. lemme consult the thesaurus.
Well that's no good, it keeps wanting me to use "salute" instead of hello. Although it's second choice is "opening volley" which does sound interesting. I'm sure the NRA would approve.
FEEL THE NOISE
Now that I've got the Quiet Riot out of my system (You youngsters might not get that reference) lemme tell ya to check out the new story. I first heard about this one while I was coming back from Seattle and made Jason drive 200 miles out of the way to check it out. It's all about noise and sound and the nasty things the government is trying to do with it. Play some Korn really loud while you read it, OK?
ALL HAIL ZONTAR!
Freaky reader Bob sent in a picture of a statue he made to pay homage to the great 1966 movie classic "Zontar, Thing From Venus"
I gotta admit that's a mighty fine statue and any man who digs a John Agar flick can't be all bad. If you ain't seen Zontar lemme just say that it's one of my top 50 films-so-bad-they're-good. Rent this sucker tonight and soon you'll be staring at your television screen with a look of aghastment on your face (Did I use aghastment properly?)
THAT ELECTION THING
Contrary to what a lot of e-mailers think, I had nothing to do with the current election mumbo jumbo going on in this great state. So all you guys should quit e-mailing me and saying that I'm somehow connected. I've already spoken with Secretary of State Warren Christopher and carefully explained to him that any problem is inherent in the system and can not be blamed on me for writing in Yog-Sothoth for President. Any other questions should be relayed to my lawyer.
POP GOES THE WEASEL (or in this case, pop goes Derek)
Derek "Very Metal" Barnes