August 9th, 2000

Hey guys,

Sorry about that little freak out up there in the great Northwest. I'd love (well ok maybe love is a stretch) to tell you what happened but I'm sorta trying to put it out of my mind. Sometimes I go to far for a story and that was one of those times.

Anyway I'm currently making my way to Sin city (that's Las Vegas to all you Baptists) in order to hook up with Jason. He's been kind enough to turn his rig around and meet me there. That's a good thing cause I'm not sure this car could handle driving back to Florida. Plus I don't think Jason will be too upset at having to hang out there for a day or so. If ever there was a town that had Jason's name on it, Las Vegas is it.


Yup, I buckled down while I was on the road and got another story for you to read over your morning coffee. Read all about that wacky Hutu chief with the snake staff and lemme know what ya think.


Boy you guys sure liked this last contest. I got enough poetry in my e-mail to make me feel like I was a 10th grade English teacher. After pouring through the results I've picked what I think was the best one. The winner is John out of Mesquite Texas with this little ditty,

Grandma Called J.F.K.

She called the White House.
She tried to stop J.F.K.
Grandma wasn't drunk.

Sorta makes you cry, don't it? For his efforts John gets a Freakylinks t-shirt (just the thing to impress the chicks out there in Mesquite with)

I got some other great haikus as well. If you wanna check them out click here.

I got a real interesting letter and pic from a Freakylinks reader named Jennifer. Here's what she wrote:

Dear Derek,

I have "Freaky Feet". My husband loves my feet, I always felt lucky that I found someone who appreciates me. He suggested I see if anybody out in the big wide world thinks I have "Freaky Feet" too. So, my marketing plan is to send you a picture and see what you and your staff thought. I know its possible they are just gross and I can live with that, but you never know maybe there is some freaky fetish person out there who will see my feet and make me a million with them. I know you probably get a million emails a day and your staff has to weigh through a lot of junk emails, but if you do get this, could you please let me know that you did receive the picture I am sending with this. Thanks again.

Now I'm not that big on feet (unless they belong to a Yeti) but when someone sends me a picture like this I feel it's my God giving right to post it on the internet for the world to see. If anyone has any comments they would like to send to Jennifer and her foot-loving husband I suggest posting on the discussion board. I'm sure they'd love to hear your ideas. (just make sure to keep them PG-13)

OK, that about wraps things up, I've still got a heap of driving in front of me and the closer I get to Florida the better I feel so I'm hitting the road again. Keep checking out the diary for updates . . .

Hurdy Gur,
Derek "haikus R us" Barnes

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