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DIARY OF A MADMAN
June 1st

Hey there fellow freaks,

What's happening. I spent the last coupla days being a responsible young adult. Had the car tuned up, mowed the grass so the landlady won't yell at me. Washed some clothes. All in all I did the upright uptight citizen thing.

Man, was it boring.

Luckily though one of my friends called to save me from a life in dullsville.

Rich is this guy who owns a pop culture store here. He sells toys from the 50's thru 80's, whacked out 60's plastic furniture and anything else that catches his attention for longer than 30 seconds. He goes on these road trips to the bad lands of Alabama and Georgia to find under priced stuff so he can bring it back here, wipe the dust off of it and call it a collectible. All in all it sounds like a pretty cushy job.

Anyways, he gave me a ring and told me he was a going on a road trip, his girlfriend Martha Mae couldn't go and wanted to know if I was into it. He pays for the gas and motels. All I do is sit back and feed my face in the lowest cost possible.

Well friends and neighbors I thought for about 2 seconds and said yes. Even better the new job bought the story about having to go to my Aunt's funeral and so I still have a job if I want when I get back. (That's the beauty of getting new jobs, you can keep having the same relatives die over and over again)

We leave on the 6th and to celebrate I unfroze the credit card. (which is a trick my mom taught me. If you have a credit card, stick it in a block of ice in the refrigerator. That way it'll keep you from overspending and if you really want something it takes a while for the ice to melt) So with my slightly cold revolving line of credit I went to Bobo's Cheap Computer Shack and bought a used laptop. My ever so generous friend Lan is going to tell me how to download stuff from the laptop while I'm traveling around this great land of ours. (I think it involves the use of a lot of wires and a pay phone)

That's right baby, I'm now on the road just like Charles Kuralt.

I'll keep you up to date on the goings on. Mom's keeping Mr. Crowley. If you see me on the road it's OK to wave but do not under any circumstances wave a Mr. T. doll at us. Rich takes that kinda stuff seriously.

hurdy gur,
Derek "I got a tiger by the tail" Barnes


Previous (05/17/98)

Next (06/07/98)
DIARY OF A MADMAN

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